Who the fuck do the South Dakotians (or South Dakotites, or whatever the hell they’re called) think they are, labeling wolves “varmints”? Last week, their state legislators passed a bill to reclassify wolves from protected to “varmint,” lumping them in with coyotes, foxes, skunks, gophers, ground squirrels, chipmunks, jackrabbits, marmots, porcupines, crows, and prairie dogs, all of whom were native to the state before modern humans came along and branded them with that degrading epithet.

The reclassification of wolves in South Dakota seems a bit hasty, as there are currently no known wolves living there. Sure, they occasionally pass through the state in search of greener, or wilder, pastures. Three such adventuresome lone wolves (probably young males) were killed in different parts of the state in 2012—one was hit by a car near Pine Ridge, one died in a lethal trap set for coyotes and another was shot outside the town of Custer, in a case of “mistaken identity” (mistaken, no doubt, for a coyote—a “varmint” species which can be killed on sight year-round).

Wolf advocates should know that the malicious evil the wolves have been forced to endure at the hands of humans for the past couple of years is the same kind of brutality coyotes have suffered from the get go. Now, with their reclassification, anyone with a South Dakota hunting license that allows them to shoot predators will be able to shoot wolves too.

There isn’t a more arrogant term than “varmint” for a species far better suited to life on the open plains and prairies than humans could ever hope to be.

Var•mint
noun. Informal [vahr-muhnt] Chiefly Southern and Mid-U.S.
Definition:
a. One that is considered undesirable, obnoxious, or troublesome.
b. An objectionable or undesirable animal, usually predatory, as a coyote or bobcat.
c. A despicable, obnoxious, or annoying person.

Considering the kind of mindset displayed in the following quote, “My only real regret, is that there aren’t more days in the week and more hours in a day and more days off to hunt coyotes!” the burning question is, who’s the real varmint?

The quote is from one of the operators of “Varmint Safari.”

To give you an idea what kind of people hunt “varmints,” below are their ads for a series of hunting videos this particular brand of varmint sells.

(Note the comment, “Filmed almost entirely on public land” as well as their unabashed exuberance in stating, “Hundreds of spectacular kills”)…

Four great varmint hunting videos!
Varmint Safari 4 features:
• 90 minutes of action packed coyote hunts!
• 40 kills by recreational callers just like you!

Varmint Safari 3 features:
• Western Rock Chuck hunting at its finest!
• Filmed almost entirely on public land

Varmint Safari II features:
• 3 Hours of solid varmint hunting action!
• Coyotes, Prairie Dogs, Chucks, Rabbits

Varmint Safari features:
• 2 Hours of hunting and information!
• Hundreds of spectacular kills!

Still not sure who the varmints are? See Definition c., above.

Text and Wildlife Photography ©Jim Robertson, 2013. All Rights Reserved