Make no mistake; though my last name is Robertson, I’m no relation to those imposters from that stupid “reality” TV show, “Duck Dynasty” whose ugly mugs grace the front of a new line of T-shirts for sale at Wal Mart.

How do I know they’re ugly when I don’t get cable and have only seen their show once, for less than a minute? It’s true you can’t really tell what they look like under all that facial hair, but like I said, I saw their show once—for almost a minute. That’s all it took to see how ugly they are on the inside.

Before I realized what I’d stumbled upon and could flip the channel away from the enticing ignorance, I was forced to endure a tactless, feeble joke about roadkill and the approving chortles that followed.

The attitude toward wildlife exhibited by the “cast” of Douche Dynasty is an insult to the…